The Rise Of The Rail Nazis
Are nazis taking over our sport? Add your comments below and the best one wins a mug.
Taken from Whitelines 104
Words by Danny Kinstreet
Illustration by Stone
Haters. They’re everywhere. They lurk below the comments line of every Youtube video and every post on Transworld. Their badly spelt, hypocritical and hyperbolic comments litter Facebook walls all over the web, hurling abuse at snowboarders of all shapes and sizes, from untalented amateurs to the top pros. Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against a bit of good-natured piss-take or light-hearted banter, but it does seem to me that snowboarders are a particularly vicious lot when it comes to trolling – specially when we’re all supposed to be mellow, laid-back types who enjoy a bifta more than a drunken brawl.
But while snowboarders of all stripes are capable of being vicious, what’s struck me recently is that there’s a particular breed who are more vicious than most. We’re not talking about your common or garden troll who comes creeping out to hate on Shaun White videos here. We’re talking about the ones who will be on the comment sections slating 90 percent of the snowboard edits they watch. I like to call them Rail Nazis. Because while this is a bit of a generalisation, it seems to me to be rail riders who get the most vicious, and spend the most time ‘calling people out’.
Now the question of what’s ‘legit’ snowboarding is a complicated one. I can understand for example, how triple cork videos might come in for some flack. They’re not the most stylish trick on a snowboard. You’re missing the point of progression if you expect them to be, but you’re right, they don’t look as good as a classic method or a front board. I can understand too, how watching the 13-year-old girls screaming Mark McMorris’ name from the front row of the US Navy-sponsored X Games arena makes some people worry about where the sport’s headed. I can see why people think that rail riding, or just filming a video part with your mates is a ‘purer’ form of snowboarding. I agree with all that. That’s not the issue I have with the Rail Nazis. No, my problem is that true Rail Nazis don’t just hate on contests and the like. Nope, they’ll happily hate on their own kind too. They take their hate to the streets.
“You didn’t spin hardway on? Not legit.”
“The rail is in the park, not down some back alley? Pffff…”
“What do you mean your board’s not at exactly 90 degrees as you rode through the kink on that back lip? I don’t care if it’s a sixty-stair set, that’s a zeach goddamn it!”
The other day I came across a debate on the Whitelines Facebook page about an Eero Ettala edit. While even those who disliked his riding style admitted that the tricks were impressive (one of them had just got him on the cover of Onboard after all) they still managed to object to the fact that his pants were baggy (these things are seriously important) and (horror of horrors!) he was wearing his goggles on the streets!
These aren’t your common or garden trolls
I don’t know if it’s just because rail riders tend to be younger, and so are more likely to be internet-savvy, but you don’t get the same kind of comments on backcountry edits. I mean everyone knows that the stuff Terje wears makes him look a bit like your dad when he’s just standing around, but as soon as he steps on a board, none of that matters. You certainly wouldn’t have powder lovers getting on and slating him just because of the width of his pants… nope, this kind of properly militant style-Nazism only really seems to exist amongst the rail riding fraternity.
Which is weird, because it’s these people more than anyone else who think competitive, judged snowboarding is narrow and derivative. And yet, aren’t the ‘rules’ they are imposing equally narrow? It’s these folk who are most up in arms when snowboarding starts getting too close to gymnastics. But isn’t saying “it’s not legit unless it’s exactly 90 degrees” pretty much the same as telling gymnasts they can’t win unless their feet are perfectly together? Rail Nazis will claim that they’re all about keeping snowboarding free and ‘skate’ – keeping it a lifestyle, rather than a sport. But what’s ‘skate’ about applying rules to street riding? Sure, style is subjective, but when you start turning your opinions into rules, then aren’t you undermining everything you thought was cool about snowboarding in the first place? It’s like Indiana Jones once said. “Nazis! I hate those guys…”
Is style the be-all end-all in snowboarding? What is “good style”? Where do you draw the line between celebrating stylish riding and being a hater?
Best comment wins a Whitelines mug and a protractor to make sure you never zeach again.
Snowboarding is about being with your mates enjoying snowboarding for the feel and fun factor! whether your in the park, street or back country, just riding lines or throwing tricks, none of it matters if its not FUN and last time i checked RULES only make things shit! So anyone who hates someones video part etc is just trying too hard to be cool and may not have friends, maybe we need to arrange a haters day at a resort so these people may make friends and discover snowboardings true nature!
Hitler loved to TRAIN on the RAILS, he especially liked the snow CAMPS in Austria :-0
omg. you are hilarious ! :))))))))
Fuck the haters! I will zeach all the boxes and rails i can find and i couldnt give 2 shits. Its about fun and nothing else really matters.
The yanks will likely claim they won the war on the rail Nazi’s too
You mean they didn’t?
That’s not what the movies say…
Just have fun and ride with your bros. At the end of the day that’s what it is and should be all about.
I never know Charlie Chaplin could snowboard!
p.s. it tht Burton’s new logo?
Ok. Ze park is now mine. All you skiers can go hit ze showers.
I fucking hate snowboarders. Eat my shit.
To me a good snowboarder is someone who has style. I’d always rather have a small bag of really sick looking tricks than a large back of hucky, hardways 180′s, pretzel 360s out. To me, style is a rider who looks comfortable and effortless when snowboarding, not flailing, arms everywhere. This is all personal opinion and we could argue all day about it, but really, I think people have missed the point of shredding. Snowboarding makes me happy, I look stupid when I try dumb shit to progress, but at least I’m trying and having a blasty blast doing it.
Have some fun and stop concerning yourself with what everyone else is doing. And if you’re concerned about fashion – go ride at Bear Mountain. I’ve never seen such an eclectic mix of attire on the hill……
Variety is the spice of life!
Solid tech on huge rails from the Helgassons, Rock solid bolts riding from Horgmo and Balls out steeze from Jones make a nice contrast to the pure skate style of Gus Engle or Cale Zima and the creativity of Scott Stevens.
And at the end of the day If you don’t like the way someone rides, go out and do it properly yourself!
Snowboarding is about having fun – whatever way you arrive at that fun can be lightyears away from another boarder, but it matters not a jot.
The very idea that being a little – or a lot – more technically competent at a sport makes you more ‘legit’ is as tragic as it is laughable. So next time anyone’s tempted to laugh at the guy on YouTube or cut up the newbie on the green run it’s always worth remembering that there’s always someone better than you out there.
Do you want them laughing at you and treating you like scum, or do you want them to give you a quick smile, some encouragement and maybe help you get that little bit better? Because at the end of the day, that feeling that we’ve all tackled the mountain together and earned that first drink of the night is unbeatable. You’ll never get it back once you’ve ripped the heart out of your passion and wrapped it in cynicism, smart-arse comment and too-cool-for-school attitude.
Granted, I’m closer to 40 than 20 these days, and snowboarding nirvana is a day or a holiday with my wife or mates, a bowl of pasta at night and a few drinks, spending my days pointing a board down a hill or making some utterly basic jumps.
But you know what, that little bit of speed, that neat landing to my simple jump, still gets my heart in my mouth, still gets a stupid grin on my face, and still reminds me that I’m alive and that an average, very average, intermediate boarder can be in love with the snow, the mountain, and his board, as deeply as any big-mouth in the latest gear with a chip on his shoulder.
In fact, probably even more so, because I treasure each and every chance I get to take to the hills, be it my native Scotland, or further afield in Canada or the Alps, I’ve had some of my happiest days, biggest thrills, most memorable holidays, biggest hangovers and sorest ribs.
And I wouldn’t change any of it for some sad fool who’s forgotten about the pure passion and joy of snowboarding because he’s sitting at home bitching over someone else’s technique.
As long as there is snow and I can play in it, I like others should not worry about the direction of the sport as it is your choice which way you take it.
It has changed for the better as you now have better and more options to where to snowboard…. indoor and out.
more money, more sponsorship means more opportunities for the sport and everyone connected to it.
Now…. Hitler on the other hand was an avid snowboarder, in fact ive heard he actually invented the sport (board of choice… Fuhrur 156 )and some guys call mr simms and burton???? were hanging with him one day on the hill when he had to rush off to Poland for some reason. They though it would be a good idea to push his invention without him knowing.
the rest as they say…. is history!
Im just amazed that well known celebrated UK sponsored snowboarders can get away with being so childish and nasty and no one picks them up on it. No one wants to cross them in case they’re ostricised from the scene.
My slightly different, and obviously comment provoking shred edits, came under attack from such a individual. Here’s the entire trolling if you can be bothered to read it. My philosophy is if they’re not prepared for other people to see it, don’t say it in the first place.. weasels!
http://www.forwardlean.co.uk/ftp/Cut&Run-Facebook-Debate.jpg
still not over it then?
Its just relevant isn’t it. I’m sure its of interest to readers and I just enjoy showing what some people are really like. I couldn’t care a less what their opinion is, just how others view them.
If you had a left knee like that & somebody set up your bindings that way, you’d be pretty pissed to! :oO
Who gives a fuck….
hit’n'ler’rails like zee nazzi slide
There is a difference with what people do on there own time having fun and what people should be doing in edits and magazines. Yes a nosepress should be straight and with out taps and yes a boardslide should be 90 degrees and between the feet. Especially if it is going to be in a magazine or on a website. No one cares if joe bloggs does a krooked boardslide if he himself is not trying to claim he is a pro doing stuff proper.
For those haters who own brands (Thrashmore) or are paid by brands (Will Smith – unlucky name btw), be careful what you say on social media – puts people off you and what you stand for. You both sound like tossers.
At the end of the day, who gives a shit. Whatever you do on a Snowboard is good.
Why exactly are you calling me a ‘hater’ John? i LOVE snowboarding. Why else would i do stuff like organise ‘fivers for trannys’, make the Leeds Wetfart2 edit, do band tours to ski resorts, take photos, write articles and much else besides? Definitely not for the money, that is for sure.
It seems to me that, at least on this page, the term ‘hater’ is applied here to anyone who expresses an opinion. As David Thorne says – ‘opinions are like nipples. Everyone has them and you are never going to like them all’. If I can be called a hater for what I wrote in that thread then every critic of film, food, music or whatever is a full on hater… And if that is the case then I’m proud to be a hater because without criticism there is seldom improvement.
Fortunately I am a tosser, so you hit the nail on the head there at least.
Ian is sound leave him alone, he’s smarter than all of us so he’ll only bamboozle you if you push too hard.
The name is A!
And I’m back in command!
Cause I’m the illest fuhrer
Representing Deutschland
Reich 1, reich 2, reich 3..
That’s me! The master mind behind World War 3
No, 2! My bad! Oh well, start it over!
Been gone for so long but now I’m back and I’m a bad ass rail rider, i’ll show ya!
Everybody Hitler-hatin when they speak my name! Don’t hate us snowboarders, it’s such a shame :-(
But it’s the new millenium and the Fuhrer has changed!
And what I bet yall didn’t know is now I’m down with the jews!
The gypsies, homosexuals and retards too!
Cause I stopped burning people, started burning CD’s!
Stopped battlin’ the world, started battlin’ MC’s!
Just started bustin’ rhymes, finally found my groove,
And now the “S.S.” on my jacket stands for “Super Smooth”
Sliding down the rail on my one piece plank!
Sittin’ drinkin’ Cris’ with my ***** Anne Frank!
And when I step into the club’s you know I’m steppin with style!
Raise my left hand, party people say “Heil!”
Got a page from Eva Braun, that I’ll say that I missed,
There’s a party up at Schindlers and I’m on his “A-list!”
Cause I put my past behind! Ya’ll can think what you will!
But no more propoganda, it’s Triumph on the hill!
Yo, that’s it that’s my rhyme!
We rail grinders outta here!
Give it up! Give it up!
Boom.
This is the most amazing thing I’ve ever read!
I’ll only take someone seriously if they invade Poland and then shoot themselves in the head a few years later. Baggy trousers? Pah! Unless they demand absolute obedience they are clearly a faker.
Who cares in all honesty. Some people in the industry are just up their own arses period. And those pricks at YOBEAT hate and make their own rules because their good rail riders so they feel they can call what is legit and what isn’t – like it really matters. Would be funny to see these so called ‘haters’ give it the big one in person and see what happens. Too often, people talk shite on the internet and then act surprised when a bunch of kids get shot.
Would be funny to see how badass these RAD snowboarders really are in a UFC cage before they run their wack offensive opinions off. Problem being everyone THINKS their too cool!
I admit it, I used to be a rail nazi. I never hated people in the comment sections, but I did in my head. Then I hit a serious plateau in my riding. For 2-3 years until I realized I was trying the same 10-15 tricks over and over trying to make all my stuff “legit” and “perfect”. It got to the point where the outcome I expected every time was perfection. Sad part is, when I did stomp a trick I would be disappointed that it took me a couple of tries. And god forbid i wasn’t stomping my tricks everyday. It would honestly ruin my whole day and I would leave the Mtn angry.
Eventually, I relaxed, and realized that legit doesn’t matter. It’s just a bonus. I changed my focus to making sure I have the most fun I can. Even if that means having a session with some 10 year-old kid on a tiny jump, or ride-on butter box.
The result of this renewed perspective, I started learning all kinds of new tricks and began dropping hammers way more often than when it was my only goal. Funny when you stop searching for something you end up finding it.